Struggling.

struggle

I’ve been a bit of a hot mess lately.

The summer was kind of hard.

Loss. Uncertainty. Change.

These are a few of my least favorite things.

My situation isn’t dire. I’m not in bed all day every day. I’m not in need of Prozac or Lithium. I’m just a bit more bummed/on edge than I might otherwise be. Some are universally problematic, some are more first world problems. But they’ve got me down.

Things that shouldn’t feel overwhelming, feel overwhelming. I’ve been needing more sleep. I got crazy sick last week for seemingly no reason (it was like a cold that turned into the flu that had me down and out for almost a week!). Things that shouldn’t upset me are making me unreasonably angry or sad.

I’m digging out of it. I know I feel better when I get the good sleep and regular exercise. I feel better when I force myself to be around people, even though I sometimes don’t feel like it. I feel better when I let myself skate on some of the things, but I also feel better when I make myself do some of the things.

So I’m trying to be patient with myself and with others. I’m trying to be chill about the things that need to be done and my expectations. It’s not my favorite way to be, but it’s OK. And it will get better.