Accentuate the Positive

I don’t know if it’s hyper-sensitivity, but it seems like everywhere I look these days, I’m seeing comments about how people, specifically mommy bloggers are skewing their lives purposefully to make it look as though everything is perfect – that their kids never have tantrums and eat only organic locally sourced food and their houses are always spotless and their Christmas gifts nothing but homemade. I know these comments aren’t directed at me – I fly so far under the blogging radar with popularity they can’t be (and don’t get me wrong – I LIKE THIS) but these comments rub me the wrong way. Because, duh, if you look around my archives you will rarely find me saying a negative word about much of anything. My complaints are mainly about being busy/tired are about as deep as it gets. But there are some very good reasons why:

1. I TRULY believe in the power of positive thinking, being, existing. I find that when I focus on the negative by writing about it, talking about it, dwelling on it, I get immersed in the negative and then it’s a positive feedback loop where I stay there. That doesn’t mean I gloss over or hide the bad stuff, but I deal with it and move on. This is the same reason why I don’t watch the news. It depresses me and I can’t really do much about it, so I focus on what I can control and do good in my own life.
2. Complaining about the bad stuff just seems … petty. I have a damn good life. I am incredibly lucky and I know it. I have an wonderful circle of family and friends, a roof over my head, food to eat and even a job I like! Complaining about the small “first world problems” I have just seems petty. I’d rather celebrate the good stuff and be grateful for it instead of whining about the bad.
3. This blog is not anonymous. I know probably 60% of my readers in real life, from family to friends to coworkers to clients to online friends who have become real-life friends. It’s great, but that being said, it doesn’t give you a ton of freedom to vent. And I’m not talking about inter-personal problems, necessarily. My kids and husband deserve some privacy and when everyone knows you and your family personally I’m not about to share private details of our lives that they’d rather I keep to myself. It’s not fair.

But just to make you feel better, some (negative) truths:

1. I have been fighting to lose the same 10 lbs for what seems like years now. Really it’s months. Up 5 lbs, down 7 lbs, up 4 lbs, down 2 lbs. Over and over. It’s maddening and I am the only person to blame for it as I really like food way too much.
2. My house is never clean. Ever. It is not filthy – we have someone come clean it every other week and I clean our kitchen every night, but I wage a constant battle on most other fronts. There is always too much clutter. The laundry is never done and I don’t just mean in the way that we’re wearing clothes that are currently getting dirty. I mean I usually have a load in the dryer that needs folded and a couple hanging around that are folded but haven’t been put away and frankly may never be put away. I don’t iron ANYTHING. My windows have been washed only once in the almost 8 years we’ve lived in the house and it was only the first floor ones when we painted and I didn’t even do it, my dad did.
3. I yell at my kids. I try not to, but sometimes I do. I get impatient with them when they take too long to do things sometimes. I know it isn’t fair and I try hard to curb my reactions, but I do not always succeed. I am also LOUSY at playing make believe with them. Games? Cooking? Crafting? Yes. Playing pretend? Absolute crap. Bores me to tears. I also hate singing the same song 50 thousand times in a row. I will also occasionally put them to bed early because I am tired myself and/or I have something to do that they cannot interrupt.
4. Loki is neglected. He gets fed, he has a small yard to play in, but he rarely goes on walks and the only time he gets bathed is when he goes to the vet to be boarded when we’re out of town. I try to make up for it with  snuggles and hiking and camping trips, but honestly, he is farther down on my priority list than I want him to be.
5. My personal grooming is limited to clean clothes, neat hair, tinted moisturizer and lip gloss. That is all. Sometimes I feel like I should change this, but once again with the priority list.